Recently, I  went back to my hometown to visit my Grandpa, whose health was declining after 10+ years of living with cancer.

You see, my grandfather and I have a complicated relationship. However, I’ve learned that you can still have love for someone who hurt you. You can have love for an imperfect human. Grief is complicated.  You can extend comfort and affection to someone who is suffering even if your relationship hasn’t warranted it.

Nothing’s changed about our past relationship, yet I want to be the kind of person who extends grace and love. Doing so doesn’t negate the ways I was hurt or harmed, but it’s the kind of life I want to lead.

Despite our differences, Grandpa built an amazing family with Grandma. Together they walked in faith and solidified the values of family and God first in all of us. Our family is where it’s at today because of my Grandpa’s hard work building that foundation. And for that, I am very thankful.

We miss you Grandpa, rest in peace.